No movie this week. There's nothing really coming out, and Mass Effect 3 is being released on Tuesday. So I will be busy saving the galaxy (again). Also, March Madness starts next week, and SWTOR is supposed to have a huge patch drop some time in March. It's entirely possible that I won't leave my room for a month. But that's beside the point. This column will be about something I haven't touched on that much - music.
On Facebook, I've seen a couple of images floating around. Both of them have two pictures, with a photo of an artist and a caption of his lyrics above a photo of Justin Bieber and a caption of the chorus to his song Baby (sample lyrics: And I was like baby, baby, baby, oh / Like baby, baby, baby, no / Like baby, baby, baby, oh / I thought you'd always be mine, mine). Inevitably, both pictures will imply that Justin Bieber is killing music. The first picture compares him to Frank Sinatra, and the second compares him to Tupac Shakur. That leads me to this.
Let's take a look at the implications of the Sinatra picture. Obviously, they're trying to prove that music is getting worse, with Bieber's Baby held up as the standard of putritude. For anyone who thinks that music was better way back when, I would like to refer you to the Nostalgia Filter. Quick, who can name the #1 single from 1969? Was it something by the Beatles? Led Zeppelin? Black Sabbath? Ha, no. It was by The Archies, and it was called Sugar Sugar (Sample lyrics: Sugar, ah honey honey / you are my candy girl / and you got me wanting you / honey, ah sugar sugar / you are my candy girl / and you got me wanting you). And this is supposed to be 40 years of superior to Bieber how?
But wait, let's not leave it at that. We got to pick which Bieber song was ruining music, so let's go back to other artists and see what they've written as well. How 'bout a small band from
But wait, should we actually take a look at Frank Sinatra himself? Yes, yes we should. And I don't mean to look down on him, because most of his lyrics are actually pretty tremendous (although I don't know enough to be truly judgemental). Instead, I trawled through some lyrics sites and came up with Yes Sir That's My Baby (sample Lyrics: Yes sir, that's my baby / No sir, I don't mean maybe / Yes sir, that's my baby now / Yes, ma'm, we've decided / No ma'm, we won't hide it / Yes, ma'm, you're invited now / By the way, by the way / When we meet the preacher I'll say / Yes sir, that's my baby / No sir, I don't mean maybe / Yes sir, that's my baby now). And those are all the lyrics. To the entire song. Very polite, yes, but very short. And all of his songs are like that. He could get good lyrics, because he only put 50 words in.
Anyway, now let's go onto the second image, comparing Tupac to Bieber. It also has a Youtube View count, implying that not only is music getting worse, but that people's taste in music is getting worse as well. Harumph, I say to that. Firstly, they compared Keep Ya Head Up to Baby. Hmm, maybe we should pick another Tupac song. How 'bout Thug in Me? (Sample Lyrics: *expletive deleted* *sex descriptions* *expletive deleted* *racial word I'm not allowed to say* *sex depictions). So Keep Ya Head Up might be about female empowerment, but Thug in Me is about how good sex with Tupac is, 'cause he's such a thug. Alternatively, it might be told from the point of view of a thug who thinks he's much better at sex than he really is. However, then we'd have to be open to the possibility that Baby is simply a clever parody of the shallow pop music that so many people crave. The problem is that according to Poe's Law, some parodies tend not to be caught.
Next, let's look at the audiences. Bieber is aimed at female teens and tweens. Tupac? Not so much. He skews to the young, urban crowd (and please don't read urban as black. My first year of university was spent in a dorm filled with young white boys who loved rap. I didn't really care for it, because I was more into techno and punk. Ironically, ten years later, I'm starting to come around on rap). There's some overlap, to be sure, but to compare Tupac and Bieber would be akin to trying to say that Pearl Jam is better than Enya, because who likes that New Age-y stuff anyway? And yes, both Pearl Jam and Enya are incredibly talented, and I've liked bits and pieces of both. You just can't compare two wildly different styles. For that matter, you can't compare similar styles either, but we'll get to that.
Female teens and tweens can like a lot of different, varied stuff. Individually, they'll like and dislike a great many things, but occasionally, they'll all get together and collectively really like the same things. Bieber, for one. Twilight, as another. The weird thing is, the rest of society has decided that if this particular group of people universally likes something, it must be terrible. It's like their opinions are automatically invalid, and wrong to boot. It's why both Twilight and Bieber have such massive Hate-doms.
Why can't people like what they like? People have confused Quality with Enjoyment. For instance, Drive was a quality movie, but I didn't enjoy it. Transformers was a thoroughly enjoyable movie, but not quality. But it seems that people think it has to be good to be enjoyable, and if it's not one, it's neither.
But let's take an actual glimpse into the actual lyrics of Justin Bieber himself. Yes, Baby has simplistic and repetitive lyrics. Is that his fault? No, because like many artists, he doesn't write his own stuff (well, not all of his own stuff. I'm sure he contributes the occasional line and song). Talented actors are paid to act, not write. Talented singers should be expected to sing well (something that Bieber does fantastically, if you'd be willing to put down your blogs and actually go listen to him). Now how about some of his other songs, besides Baby? ... Actually, I can't find any that aren't just as generic. Ain't that a kick in the head?
This is the only example I know of that combines Quality, Enjoyment and Justin Bieber: "Hot Jumping Beans" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_gXotGSe_JE
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