RED

Last night, Evan and I went to see RED. It started off well, because Evan forgot about the preview game, so I got all but one. If fact, it’s the first time I’ve ever gotten the Green Hornet preview before him. He’s usually locked in on that one.

The movie itself starts of with Bruce Willis, living out his retirement. He has a house, spartanly decorated, and he rips up his pension checks so he can talk to the woman who handles that (played by Mary-Louise Parker. You’ll know her from Weeds or from guest starring frequently in The West Wing). Eventually, people try to kill him. He goes on the lam and takes Parker along with him (she’s now a target because ‘They’ know he likes her). He goes about trying to find out who’s trying to kill him and why, in the process getting his old team back together. His old team is played by Morgan Freeman, John Malkovich, and Helen Mirren. They’re all ex-CIA. There’s a ‘with’ role (‘With’ roles are smaller than starring roles, but larger than cameos or small roles. The people playing them get introduced at the end of the credits by ‘with [insert actor’s name]) played by Brian Cox. Basically, everyone’s old and bad-ass. By the way, if you're wondering what RED stand for, it's Retired, Extremely Dangerous. Which seems like one of those things that only exists in movies, like KOAS or congress.

The action’s great. That’s to be expected. It’s a Bruce Willis action movie (hereafter noted as a BWAM). What was completely unexpected was the humour. This movie is Hilarious! Seriously! While there are enough jokes with punch lines, most of the humour is from Malkovich’s performance. He steals the movie. By the time the credits role, it’s completely clear he’s made of Awesome (and LSD). Mostly, it fits right into my comedy niche of zany antics (like Better Off Ted or Monty Python).

Of course, everyone in the movie can act. The biggest gamble is probably Karl Urban (he plays the opposing agent). And even though his accent shows through at times, he’s fine. Everyone else is fine. So pretty much, the acting is perfect. The comedy timing is fantastic. It’s pretty much a great movie. As a bonus, there are postcards that indicated where each of the locations are. Most of them are functional, but some of them are absolutely hilarious.

So yeah, it’s a theatre movie. Totally unexpected, but completely delightful. It’s like an older, classier Expendables (although Stallone probably could’ve been in both). Not quite as over-the top, but much funnier. For instance, there’s no possible way I could end this review as humorously as the movie did, so I’ll just leave you with the thought of Malkovich in a dress.