Movie and Comic Books

This post is going to be short, for a couple of reasons. One, there is this little thing called the Grey Cup going on. It’s the championship game of the Canadian Football League, and my beloved Saskatchewan Roughriders are playing in it. Go Riders! Secondly, out of all the different media types I’ve talked about (video games, TV, books), I have the least experience with comics. I’ve just never gotten into them. Yeah, I like comic strips (who doesn’t like Calvin and Hobbes, or The Far Side?) and there are some Star Wars comics I’ve read (Twin Engines of Destruction follows Boba Fett dealing with an imposter), and there’s even a graphic novel adaptation of the unfilmed final episode of a tragically cancelled TV show called The Middleman that I want to get a hold of. But by and large, I just can’t get into them.

Also, don’t get in my face about comic books and graphic novels. Graphic novels are what we call them these days because they’ve gained legitimacy now that the readers have grown up. But I’ll refer to them as comic books because that’s what they’ve been since the 30’s when they came out. If you want to feel superior, go ahead. And finally, there are two main comic publishers – Marvel and DC. If you’re wondering why Superman never meets the X-men, it’s because they’re owned by two different companies. They’re like the Coke and Pepsi of the Comic Book world. Like Mac and PC, except one doesn’t cost twice as much with half the (admittedly good) content (Booyah).

Out of all the types of media, comic books are the easiest to turn into movies. For one thing, they’re very short. And while one issue won’t wrap up a plot, three or four (sometimes six) will wrap up the main plot, take down the main villain, and save the world (again). Because they’re so short, not much of the plot, character development, dialogue, or other stuff needs to be cut to put it into the film.

Secondly, because comics have been around for decades, there’s a plethora of both plots and characters to choose from. Need a movie about the Dazzler? No problem. Luke Cage? Sure. She-Hulk? Go for it! Or not - some of the ideas suck. Be prudent, pick the right plot, and you can have a hit on your hands.

Thirdly, the movies come pre-storyboarded. Storyboarding is part of the pre-production of the film (before filming) where people sit down and visualize how each scene of the movie will go, and then draw pictures of that. Because comic books already come with those pictures, it’s really easy to adapt them to storyboarding, shortening up the production process and making it cheaper than it could be. I’ve heard that for 300, Zach Snyder just used the comic written by Frank Miller as the storyboard, not even bothering to do his own. And it was AWESOME!

Of course, there are problems. As with books, comic books have thoughts depicted that have to be conveyed somehow. Secondly, comic book heroes have an origin story of some sort, which is often adapted for the first movie of a planned franchise. Because so many comic books have been around for a while, the origin stories have to be updated to today’s world, meaning diehard fans of the original are going to be mad. And the movie company is depending on them to see the movie, so if they decide not to go, the movie might die a quick death at the box office.

To be honest, I have no idea about turning a movie into a comic book. Presumably, an author and illustrator is given the script (one of the problems with this, as pointed out by Ian in the comment section, is that they’re often given the first draft of the script, meaning any revisions aren’t going to be adapted. This is a problem with turning a movie into anything. Changes late in the production cycle are going to be missed) and then they draw a comic book from it. Whee. Actually, it can get interesting in some cases. Star Wars was adapted to comic books twice. Once when it was released, by Marvel. Because it was available to everyone, they had to tone down a lot of the violence (for instance, Luke getting his hand chopped off by Darth Vader had to be cleverly edited). A while later, it was adapted as a Manga (the definition of which is beyond me, besides it being of Japanese origins) which could show everything. So Luke getting his hand chopped off was shown in all its gruesome glory, complete with spray of blood (never mind that lightsabers cauterise wounds). So it was considered much better, because it wasn’t for kiddies. Just like Star Wars is supposed to be.

Movember

The Lord said “The Men shall not shave their beards for a period of 30 days, and they shall celebrate their facial hair. And it shall be called Movember”

2 Confusions 3:12.

There comes a time in a young man’s life (a bit after the onset of puberty) when he discovers bits of hair on his upper lip. He is extremely proud of this ‘moustache’ if it can be called that. Everyone else is disgusted, except his parents, who remind him gently that he should shave. Once it becomes unavoidable, he gingerly takes hold of the razor his mom bought him and wonders “Why on earth would I want this sharp implement anywhere near my face?” Or if they are emo “Wouldn’t this be more at home near my wrists?” (yes, I went there. That joke was so tasteless, it could be Evan-ian).

Eventually, he manages to shave of that lip hair he defiantly called a moustache, and as he gets older, settles into a routine of shaving. For some, it’s everyday. For some, it’s a few times a week. For some, it’s only a trim every month and a half or so. Sometimes it’s once a year, whether they need it or not. Some go without entirely, and grow up to be ZZ Top.

Because some men have facial hair, and some men are in movies, it’s inevitable that there will appear men with facial hair in movies. And while this can be awesome (Zach Galafianakis for the full beard, Robert Downey Jr in Iron Man for the immaculate trim), it’s most often used to help characterize the person.

For instance, the full beard is used to show manly men, or outdoors-y type men, or cavemen (not necessarily just a stereotype). Just a moustache (and a bad one at that) tends to be reserved for the adult film industry. Most other people don’t have it for fear of association, the same as the clipped moustache that Hitler wore (you’ll notice it was also worn by Charlie Chaplin).

The Goatee (particularly black) is worn by evil people. In fact, if you’re ruling a nation, and one of your advisors is bald with a black goatee, he is plotting to overthrow you. You might want to have him executed, provided he hasn’t already turned the guards against you.

When the Goatee is not worn by evil people, it is worn by young, hip, urban professionals who want to show how sophisticated they are. This is not always a stereotype. While they aren’t bad people, often the story is told from the point of view that being urban and sophisticated is worse than simple and rural. So yeah.

Villains tend to go with the long moustache, with ends they can twirl while they look over their evil plan. Snidely Whiplash is one of the better known examples. Lampshaded by Simon Tam in an episode of Firefly, after he plans and executes a heist with the rest of the team, and contemplates growing a moustache.

The Horseshoe (I had to look on Wikipedia, because I often get it confused with a Fu Manch) is often combined with a leather jacket to denote bikers, possibly a non-copyright-infringing Hell’s Angels knockoff (“We are the Heck’s Seraphim, and we’re going to administer a beatdown, if you’re willing. If not, it’s cool”).

The Thin and Long beard is often used to portray wise characters, mostly Asian. Almost all Gurus will have it, and will teach the protagonist all sorts of butt-kicking. You can find examples in Kill Bill Vol. 2, and Avatar: the Last Airbender.

Muttonchops are used for pretty much every period piece (Pride and Prejudice), although they experience a brief resurgence when Hugh Jackman sported them for his role as Wolverine in the X-Men movie. They died again when men everywhere realized they just aren't manly enough to pull it off.

Growing the Beard is a completely different phenomenon, and I encourage you to read all about it.

Missed Mindless Movie - Centurion

Centurion is one of those movies that would’ve seen wide release if it had starred more famous actors (not better, just more famous). Unfortunately, you only get an arthouse release if all you’ve ever been in was an under-the-radar HBO show (The Wire, starring Dominic West).

It’s also the movie that Robin Hood could’ve been if it hadn’t sold out for a PG rating to increase profits. Centurion is bloody, full of swears, and the epitome of guy movies set in ancient times (swords and amputations galore). I don’t really mind spoiling it because it’s not about the story (or even the acting). It’s about how long you can last without wincing. I only lasted a few minutes, but that’s because I thought the credits were a little cheesy. I mean, do we really need to know the hairdresser in giant, floating letters? The effect was great – giant floating letters in epic mountain passes – but they were a little … detailed.

The story takes place about 2000 years ago. The Centurion is at a Roman base in Britain that quickly gets overrun by Picts. He gets captured while everyone else gets killed. The Roman governor of Britain wants to wipe out the Picts to gain the political capital to return to Rome (since being the British governor has about as much meaning as the Alaskan one … oh, wait). So he sends the ninth legion in to kill them all, since the ninth legion is the most bad-ass legion in the entire Roman army. Or they act like it (in their defence, they are pretty awesome).

The Centurion escapes and meets up with the ninth legion and The General appoints him second in command to teach him about the Picts (since The Centurion can speak Pict). They march north, with the aid of a female tracker who leads them into an ambush (she’s a Pict who had unspeakable things done to her by the Romans, so she’s got a bit of a grudge). They all get slaughtered and The General gets taken captive. 7 survivors (including The Centurion) head to the camp to free the general. Since everyone looks kinda the same and they all have names like Marcus Aurelios and Romanus Longus Namus, I kept them separate by calling them The Centurion, The Old Guy, the Big Guy, The Marathon Guy (he can run really far), The Selfish Guy, The Food Guy (he’s a cook), and The Other Guy.

They sneak into the Pict camp and try to free The General, but can’t break the chains. He tells them to flee, so they do, but not before The Selfish Guy hides in a tent. The tent houses the son of the Pict leader, whom The Selfish Guy kills to keep quiet. The Pict leader discovers this in the morning, and orders their death. The Tracker kills The General, then sets out with a party to track down The Survivors.

The Survivors head north to throw the Picts off their trail, then head west and eventually south. The Picts chase them. The Survivors run. The Picts chase them some more. Many scenes of running and chasing ensue. The Selfish Guy and the Marathon Guy get separated from the group, and set off on their own. The Food Guy and The Other Guy get killed (ouch).

The Centurion, The Big Guy, and The Old Guy manage to find a hut in the middle of a bunch of dead animals. The owner is a nice woman who feels no allegiance to anyone since the Picts cast her out for being witch (she’s not, she’s just misunderstood) and so begins a wedged in romance (can’t have a movie without that!) between her and The Centurion.

Meanwhile, the Selfish Guy abandons The Marathon Guy so he can escape from wolves.

After the other three get healed and rested (and hid) in the hut, they travel to a small Roman fort, only to find it abandoned. They decide to make their stand, and manage to finally finish off the hunting party, including The Tracker. The Old Guy gets killed, though.

Afterwards, they meet up with The Selfish Guy and ride towards Roman lines. The Centurion kills The Selfish Guy after he reveals his selfish side. The Big Guy is killed completely unnecessarily.

After giving his report to The Governor, The Centurion is ordered killed (The Governor can’t let it be known the most bad-ass legion in his command got wiped out by a bunch of guerrillas). He manages to escape, and goes to live with The Witch.

There are a few problems with this movie, but not many. I can’t verify its accuracy, because I wasn’t around when Rome was getting its conquering on (like Donkey Kong). It had a lot of cool fights, but I’m used to seeing them from other historical epics (or historical flops, whichever). And I’m slowly becoming convinced that just because they look cool, does not mean they actually took place. Not that it matters. I’ll take a Ninja King Arthur if it makes a good action scene.

So I think this is a theatre movie. Good action, decent music, a lot that holds together, not that much time wasted on things like character development or thematic issues. Good times all around. Well, unless you’re The Tracker, The Selfish Guy, The Big Guy, the Food Guy, The Marathon Guy, The Old Guy, or The Other Guy. But I’m the Mindless Movie Guy, so I liked it.

Movies and Books

Turning books into movies has been around long before turning video games into movies, mainly because books have been around much longer than movies. So people have been getting a lot of practice with it (which is not to say they have gotten better). As with video games, the main issue is cutting out material to make movies, and adding material in to go the other way.

Novels generally have around 300 pages or so. Which is fine for a book, but a faithful adaptation (one which puts all the events of the book in to the movie) will take about five hours (see the BBC production of Pride and Prejudice. I’m still waiting for the movie of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies). So to make a movie of a book, you need to cut out about half (or more) of the book. Which, like video games, often makes the movie a lot stupider, as well as pissing off a lot of the fans of the book. And because the fans of the book may not be stereotyped as basement-dwelling geeks, movie makers care a lot more about them (frankly, I’d rather pander to the geekdom than fans of Twilight, but that’s why I’m not in the movie business).

One of the other issues with turning books into movies is how to accurately convey thoughts. Thoughts can be written down in the book, but are harder to get in movies. There are a few ways to deal with this. One, the movie can mute the sound and have the character voice over what their thoughts are in echo-y fashion (this is often used in TV show, but less in movies). Two, you can leave the thoughts out of it entirely, in the hopes that whatever the characters are thinking isn’t necessary to the story (frankly, a lot of times their not ... sort of like real life). Third, the character can speak in the movie what they were only thinking in the book (doing this when alone is a bit of a problem, although not as uncommon as you would think … or say). Fourth, good actors may be able to express their thoughts through facial expression, body language, and so forth. Bad actors will look like they're constipated, and terrible actors will look like a block of wood (Hi, Keanu Reeves).

Another issue is what everyone and everything looks likes. On one hand, nobody’s ever seen what the main character looks like, or what the setting is, so movie makers can’t really go wrong (unless they change hair colour or some other obviously stupid detail). But everyone who’s read the book has an idea in their heads of what each character looks like and what the setting looks like. So what’s on screen is going to different than what just about everyone thinks. Not necessarily wrong, but different.

Turning movies into books can happen in one of two ways. The first, an author writes down everything in the movie, the production company slap eight pages of colour photos inside, and markets it to kids through Scholastic book fairs. I got a copy of Meteor Man this way (a forgettable movie about a meteor that gave people superpowers).

Alternatively, an author can be hired to fill in the missing pages to get a novel-length book. They can add thoughts, lots of descriptions, background on characters, whatever they want. They just need to add something, or it’ll be a 100 page novelette. I think it’s easier than adding material to video games, because there are more options that fit better within a book than interactive media.

The big drawback, though, is that reading a book takes a lot longer than watching a movie, and most people would rather spend the two hours on the movie than two weeks (months, years) on the book. So there needs to be a big draw for the book, which means it either has to be better than the movie (usually by using a good author) or needs to have a well-known author (and keep in mind, good and well-known are not the same thing … Stephanie Meyer). So the good news is that for books of movies, we get authors like Timothy Zahn, R.A. Salvatore, Alan Dean Foster, etc … The bad news is that we know how the story ends, and all we’re getting is a bit of extra detail. Not that that’s a bad thing, it’s just not worth paying for the hard-cover. Unless it’s for Revenge of the Sith. I’ve heard that it’s much better than the movie, and explains motivations more than the movie. So as always, the lesson is: George Lucas, STOP MAKING MOVIES!